I’ll see you in the morning.

•January 14, 2008 • 4 Comments

That’s what my son told me this morning after shaking my hand as I was ready to walk out the door.   Actually, I’ll see him at dinner time but he was trying to be so proper, that I couldn’t stand to correct him.

He’s such a good kid.

I scooped him up to give him a hug before I turned to leave for work. I feel a tiny pat on my back and a whisper in my ear, “it’s ok mommy. I’ll see you later, sweetheart (which actually sounds more like fweepheart, with a southern accent. he mocks me for calling him sweetheart all the time). i can’t go to work with you. I’ll be good. you NEED to put me down now mommy…

I guess I’m the one with separation issues here….

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name name bo bame, banana fanna fo fame, me mi mo mame – NAME GAME!

•January 10, 2008 • 6 Comments

(I SO heard you singing that just now!) .:applause:.

yes – it’s a meme. hehe. i found it while randomly browsing people’s blogs and stumbled upon it at Charlotte’s Web. Don’t feel obligated to take part in this, i just found it amusing and wanted to share. I hope you enjoy it!

1. My rock star name (first pet and current car)
Max Saturn

2. My gangsta name (ice cream flavour and cookie or biscuit)
Peppermint Shortbread (wtf?!! i’m a Charlie Brown character…. basically, but a little more ghetto, it seems)

3. My fly girl name (first letter of first name, first three letters of last name)
L-Eup (it sounds like “alley-oop!” birth name: K-Fri. blah – too close to K-Fed. I can’t win, I guess no matter what I’mflashy fawn boxer puppy not fly)

4. My detective name (favourite colour, favourite animal)
Green Boxer

5. My soap opera name (middle name, city of birth)commander riker
Lynn Lenhartsville (wow I sound like a bitch)

6. My Star Wars name (first three letters of your last name, first two of your first name)
Eup Le (TOTALLY better than the fly name. Using birth name= Fri Kr…. uhm… NO. close to commander Riker from StarTREK Next Gen., whom people say my dad looks like)

7. My superhero name (second favourite colour, favourite drink, add “the”)
The Blue Red Death (ok.. so maybe i’m a colorblind, evil superhero!!?)

8. My Nascar name (first two names of my two grandfathers)
John Roy (omg, I swear that’s real… i know it sounds too perfectly hickish, but i swear I didn’t make that up! hahaha)

9. My stripper name (favourite perfume, favourite sweet)
Blush Pirouette (have you EVER tried those devilishly delicious treats from Peppridge Farm!!?! it’s impossible to stop eating them)

10. My witness protection name (mother’s and father’s middle names)
Ann Edward (blah)

11. My weather anchor name (fifth grade teacher’s name, a major city beginning with the same letter)
Carl Chicago (BUT since i’m a chick I’ll use my 4th grade teacher, making me – Diane Denver)

12. My spy name (favourite season/flower)
Summer OrchidChris Kattan - Mango

13. Cartoon name (favourite fruit plus garment you’re wearing, with an “ie” or “y” added)
Mango Slippery (this reminds me of Chris Kattan’s “Mango” from SNL?? “Mango is like a drug. You must have more and more and more of the Mango until there is no Mango left. Not even for Mango!”)

14 Hippie name (what you ate for breakfast plus favourite tree)
Water Cherry (this is hippie-ish, HOW?!!)

15. Your rockstar tour name (favourite hobby plus weather element, with “the”)
The Quilted Rain (hell yes! that’s deep….)

lies my parents told me…

•January 3, 2008 • 7 Comments

PINOCCHIOyour parents lied to you. i’m sorry if you’re sobbing now, but they did. as i’m raising my own child, who is now three, i have multitudes of time to reflect on what my parents told me or would have told me in any given situation. i think we all have those moments.

now, i grew up in an über -sheltered household (read: i never saw a movie that had a rating of PG-13 or higher until i was 18). god this is going to be embarrassing. ANYWHO, my sister and i watched a million cartoons like any other child. LOTS of cartoons. good cartoons though, like Elmer Fudd and Bugs Bunny, Tom and Jerry, stuff like that… now whenever someone was in LOVE on a cartoon, you always seen those little hearts appear out of nowhere and they’d start batting their eyelashes like crazy. my mom used to tell us that this was “flirting”. when i asked her specifically, which part of that was flirting, she showed me by batting her eyelashes and making the most bizarre googly eyes i have ever seen. i trusted my mom on this. in the third grade… i went to this guy i liked and started batting my eyelashes at him, probably looking like i had come sort of disorder. He gave me the most bizarre look, laughed, and ran away. I got home and looked it up in the dictionary (no, at the time there was no “googling” the meaning for everything, i actually had to get a papercut and look up the word using a REAL dictionary – WOW was it worth it.).

flirt (flûrt)PEPE LE PEU
v. flirt·ed, flirt·ing, flirts

v. intr.

  1. To make playfully romantic or sexual overtures.
  2. Flirting is a form of human interaction, usually expressing a sexual or romantic interest in the other person. It can consist of conversation, body language, or brief physical contact. It may be one-sided or reciprocated.

Seriously, i then knew why he laughed at me. I then proceeded down the stairs to scold my mother for lying to me. That was really just ONE of the times when she lied about something stupid and i took what she said outside of our little deranged and deceitful household.

Other popular lies my parents told me:

  • vaseline/lotion cures all invisible boo-boos immediatelyVASELINE
  • that makeup makes me ugly
  • swallowed gum stays in your stomach for 7 years – SO not true! my stomach should explode by now, because of the quantity i’ve managed to swallow while in school
  • the black watermelon seeds will cause a watermelon vine to grow in your stomach
  • crossing your eyes and sneezing will cause them to stay like that
  • my dad used to tell me that if i kept so many blankets on me all the time, i’d grow worms. i’m proud to say that i’m worm-free to this day!

hooters logoI guess i just never understood why they lied to us about stupid little things. i make it a point to tell my son the truth all the time, even though he’s three – he asked once what HOOTERS were, after driving by one day. I told him they were boobs. he just laughed. later that night at dinner with my mom (the super conservative) and my dad (the man that acts like nothing’s ever funny or amusing), i started conversation and asked my son what he did today. he said to my parents, “i like hooters. granny [my mom], you have a REALLY nice hooters.” i was in tears, and i couldn’t even bring myself up off the floor to tell him to stop. my mom turned red and ran out of the room. my dad, believe it or not, seemed like he was ready to piss his pants he was laughing so hard. all he sad through his wheezing laughter was “yes, she does”.

see – being honest with kids is FUN. lol. i know i sure as hell won’t lie to my son about anything, i don’t believe in sugar-coating.

ps. I DID get a piece of good advice from my dad, which i have learned, is no lie – in regards to letting your gas pass as a belch rather than, well…. gas. “it’s better to belch and taste it than fart and waste it.” right on dad, right on.

end ramblings. i know this doesn’t make sense, and is jumbled up – i’m multi-tasking at work now and i can’t think straight. hopefully the next post will be a little more connected. 🙂


Digg!

to read this is to know me…

•January 2, 2008 • 2 Comments

One of my favorite poems (which was the inspiration for my second tattoo) is The Chambered Nautilus – the story of my life… imagine your life as a chambered nautilus, going through the figurative motions in the poem… it’s how we all live.

Now I wish so many of these annoying things that I can’t get rid of will go away – I’m not a violent person by any means, but dear mother of jesus christ and his flock of sheep, some things just shouldn’t have happened, and some people are too ignorant and slow (like the people they keep their feet pressed to the brake at a green light) and show up all the time that you can’t forget them!!! THEY’RE EVERYWHERE!

Nonetheless, I heart this poem, and all it means to me…

______________________________________________________

The Chambered Nautilus

Oliver Wendell Holmes (1809-1894)

This is the ship of pearl, which, poets feign,
Sail the unshadowed main,–
The venturous bark that flings
On the sweet summer wind its purpled wings
In gulfs enchanted, where the Siren sings,
And coral reefs lie bare,
Where the cold sea-maids rise to sun their streaming hair.

Its webs of living gauze no more unfurl;
Wrecked is the ship of pearl!
And every chambered cell,
Where its dim dreaming life was wont to dwell,
As the frail tenant shaped his growing shell,
Before thee lies revealed,–
Its irised ceiling rent, its sunless crypt unsealed!

Year after year beheld the silent toil
That spread his lustrous coil;
Still, as the spiral grew,
He left the past year’s dwelling for the new,
Stole with soft step its shining archway through,
Built up its idle door,
Stretched in his last-found home, and knew the old no more.

Thanks for the heavenly message brought by thee,
Child of the wandering sea,
Cast from her lap, forlorn!
From thy dead lips a clearer note is born
Than ever Triton blew from wreathed horn;
While on mine ear it rings,
Through the deep caves of thought I hear a voice that sings:–

Build thee more stately mansions, O my soul,
As the swift seasons roll!
Leave thy low-vaulted past!
Let each new temple, nobler than the last,
Shut thee from heaven with a dome more vast,
Till thou at length art free,

Leaving thine outgrown shell by life’s unresting sea!

the_chambered_nautilus

I can blog!!!?

•December 27, 2007 • Leave a Comment

after one of my little rants today about my monroe piercing – i feel like i could actually take on blogging as a bad habit. some interesting things DO happen i suppose.

after all, how hard could it possibly be…